Outnumbered

Pet peeeeeeves.

I'm feeling somewhat feisty/cynical/cranky/tired today and I started to think about my pet peeves.

Then I started to think that it might make an interesting post. 

You may beg to differ and find my peeves to be perfectly acceptable. 
You also may beg to differ and find that this is not an interesting post. 
But lucky for me, this is my post & I am running with it!  Freedom of speech!  Yeah!

Here is my list:

- the term "Oh Snap".  Yeah I would get it if you were using snap instead of a swear, ie: unlike me who would prefer to say Oh Shit.   Oh snap is like a discovery, a revelation, something brilliant. Oh Snap? I hate it! Dis-like.

- people who "share" their facebook profiles. For example JaneJohn Doe.  Really? Are you that insecure or computer illiterate?  Did you and do you really have ALL the same friends? It's got to be impossible!

- people who leave their carts in the middle of the aisle of the grocery store. Really? Do you think you're the only person in the store? Move OVAAA!!

- people whose pet peeve is the whole "cell phone in public places" business. You know what? My time is precious and while I'm grocery shopping I am perfectly capable of shopping and talking.  Furthemore, it may be my only opportunity to have a conversation uninterrupted by the need to referee a fight or by someone else screaming and/or crying.

- Calling my phone/internet/satellite company. 
That's a long story, but I despise it.  It makes my blood pressure rise just thinking about it. Unfortunately all my services are from the same provider.  I won't name names but it's rhymes with SMELL. Funny because I think they smell. Stink. Ew!

- On that note, I'm peeved at myself for not changing companies.

- People who don't signal when they drive.  Did you know you should signal, then break, then turn? Is it that difficult, push the stick down or flip it up. Magical!

- People who bring their sick kids to my house, to playdates, to the bookstore, to the toy store. Ew ew, stay at home!

- PeOpLe WhO tYpE LiKe ThIs.
I don't get it. It's annoying to read, and really looks like it takes far too much time.

- People who don't want to have kids because it will ruin their body.  Um, yeah not naming names.

- People saying "I seen".  For example,
 "I seen that movie" instead of "I have seen that movie" or "I did see that movie" or "I saw that movie".   I ain't got nothin' else to say 'bout that one!

I think that's it - for now anyway.  What are YOUR pet peeves, what drives you crazy?

I feel like that was great therapy.  Whew! Thanks for reading. 

PS - Janine, you will not like this post. I must admit that Janine, unlike me, knows that patience is a virtue and has much more of it than I do.
For a feel good post, go see her at Spoonful of Sugar

: )  Keri

From spinning to road biking, adventures of Momma K

I completely FORGOT to post about my Mother's Day present!
This is what Brian SURPRISED me with on Mother's Day. Isn't it gorgeous?

Since I've been attending my spin class on a regular basis I have become even more interested in getting my flabby arse into shape getting involved in outdoor riding.

I looked into a few options and decided with some great advice from people who know something about riding real bikes that I should check out our local bike shops.
I was going to buy from Canadian Tire (my favourite Cdn store!) but instead went with the shop who specializes in biking. Great advice that my dear hubby took too since he found & bought me the perfect bike.  It was love at first sight.

The one thing that actually triggered my interest (besides my very obvious mom body) was a woman in my spin class who has Celiac's Disease. She was helping to organize and recruit people for a ride for celiac in August and made an announcement after class one morning. I thought it was the perfect way to get out there, meet new people & support a good cause.

"It's just downtown, to a local island where you have lunch and then back again" 
Oooooh, music to my ears!  She continued: "And it's just recreational, it's not a race and it's only about 58k." Fifty-eight my friends, fifty eight kilometres.  For my yankee friends, 58km is (according to google) is  36.0395291 miles.

I know that probably sounds like peanuts to some, but for me it's a little bit of a big deal. That said, the "recreational" emphasis and the fact that the proceeds from this event go to a very good cause, I signed myself up.

Now, I've got exactly 67 days to get myself ready for it.  The woman who coerced encouraged me to join them said it was probably a good idea to take the tour beforehand to see what's it's like. Oh yes, in my free time I will strap my children on my back and ride 58 km "to see what's it's like..."  : )   Okay, I'm exaggerating - I'm sure I'll be able make the trip out beforehand to see how I fare.

I'm happy to say I have publicly admitted I am dedicating Saturday mornings to spinning,  although at times I would rather spend my precious alone time doing other things, I am also letting you all know that I will  be getting myself in shape for this ride.  Please, pro-riders, biathletes, triathletes, don't mock me or laugh at me.  This is a big deal in my little world!  Baby steps, baby steps and I will get there.

Next on my list: Cut back on Doritos.   I'll keep you posted on that "to do" item.  I can almost guarantee THAT will be tougher than the 58km.

 

 

Happy Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day! Happy Mother's Day to you!

I was at a conference last week and there was one man who presented to a sea of women.  He was a dynamic speaker & I really enjoyed his talk.  He was also wise enough to start his discussion by saying Happy Mother's Day to the ocean of women whose undivided attention he had.  He mentioned that he had heard on the radio that moms don't reallllly want breakfast in bed. Well, that captured everyone's interest. 
Why?
Well, they'd just have to clean up all the crumbs and mess in the end anyway.

How true!

So what do women really want on Mother's Day?  What do YOU want for Mother's Day?

A little bit of 'alone' time was the consensus.

I agree.

My hubby and I actually decided last year, that with our lacking (errrr non-existent) time for ourselves -- it would be best if on Mother's Day & Father's Day we had a little time to do whatever we wanted.  The only stipulation: It had to be "Me" time.   I think Brian created this plan so he could go golfing on Father's Day guilt-free (haha) but I was sold on the idea.

Other than time alone, what do you want for Mother's Day?

The only additional thing I would like might be a little recognition for all mothers around the world.

I realize that some people might think that this ONE day is recognition enough....but I think it would be nice for all of the invisible tasks that moms do to be visible, even for a short while.

Invisible.  Invisible: Simultaneously carrying out tasks without so much as blinking an eye.  Invisible: Not noticed, not seen, not obvious.

Waking the kids up, while collecting laundry, while applying mascara, while planning what to discuss at this morning's meeting.

Grocery shopping, while spending quality time with the kids, while planning meals for the week, while not being able to control her urge to kiss her child's fat little cheek in the middle of the grocery store produce aisle.

Cooking dinner for tonight, while planning dinners to freeze for later, while helping a child with homework.  She may even squeeze in a facebook comment if she's lucky.

Signing permission forms, writing cheques, planning schedules, while asking her boss for another day off, for she can't possible miss being a chaperone on a child's school field trip.

Making time for friends, date nights with hubby, quality time for each child, and phone calls to family.

Writing thank-you cards, while pondering beautiful home decor plans, while deciding on & implementing the best possible storage for the mountain of toys that surrounds her.

Seamlessly...she seems to be able to fulfill an assortment of tasks. Seamlessly, she thinks that she's at her limit, but yet she finds one more thing to add onto her list of life responsibilities.  Seamless, with no complaint.

The invisible work of mothering. 

I think it's important acknowledge the invisible work of women, particularly that of mothers.

Enjoy your day mommies of the world.  Today is your day. 

May today unveil all of the invisible things you do.  

But don't fret - because even if the light doesn't reveal the entire truth of your work -  remember there is no one, not one person who can do your job of mothering the way that you do.

I hope my Mothering friends get to have an afternoon of relaxation as I am so blessed to be having - thanks to my husband, who has kindly delved into my world of invisible work and offered to not only help me, but relieve me of my duties.

Happy Mother's Day. 
I hope you get lots of love & hug & kisses from your children and your mate!
Enjoy your day.

Here is a beautiful poem I found by Alison Luterman...I hope you like it as much as I do.

Because no one could ever praise me enough,

because I don't mean these poems only

but the unseen

unbelievable effort it takes to live

the life that goes on between them,

I think all the time about invisible work.

About the young mother on Welfare

I interviewed years ago,

who said, "It's hard.

You bring him to the park,

run rings around yourself keeping him safe,

cut hot dogs into bite-sized pieces for dinner,

and there's no one

to say what a good job you're doing,

how you were patient and loving

for the thousandth time even though you had a

headache."

And I, who am used to feeling sorry for myself

because I am lonely,

when all the while,

as the Chippewa poem says, I am being carried

by great winds across the sky,

thought of the invisible work that stitches up the

world day and night,

the slow, unglamorous work of healing,

the way worms in the garden

tunnel ceaselessly so the earth can breathe

and bees ransack this world into being,

while owls and poets stalk shadows,

our loneliest labors under the moon.

There are mothers

for everything, and the sea

is a mother too,

whispering and whispering to us

long after we have stopped listening.

I stopped and let myself lean

a moment, against the blue

shoulder of the air. The work

of my heart

is the work of the world's heart.

There is no other art.

- Alison Luterman

Learning about mommy blogging

I started my first blog back in 2008 (or was it 2007?)

I started writing as a diary of my life with 2 kids.  I didn't want to forget anything, so I thought I'd simply use my blog to jot down my thoughts & feelings.  As I pursued furthering my nursing education, and had another baby, blogging took last place on my list of priorities.

My very first post was about a woman who talked to me in the mall parking lot one day...remind me and I'll post it someday (if I can find it on my old computer).  It was a moment and a piece of advice that I will never forget...

Anyway, now that I'm writing almost every day (or posting almost every day) I am learning some fun and interesting facts about mommy bloggers.

A few of my friends actually have expressed interest in blogging and I'm so excited to start reading their posts!  I have so many intelligent & creative friends who are much more witty than me...when they start blogging, I'll let you know too!

Here are a few tidbits I've discovered about mommy blogging:

1)  BLOG is actually short form for Weblog.  Get it, Web-Log!  If you're a techie you're probably rollling your eyes and scoffing at me, but I honestly did not know where "Blog" came from before I ventured into my own.

2) In addition to BLOGS, moms are also getting their stories out there and building online communities with VLOGS.  Wanna know what VLOG stands for?  Yep...you're obviously smarter than I am - video log!

3) There are many platforms you can blog on. Typepad, Wordpress, Blogger are just a few of the most popular.  They make it so easy - for the most part you pick the design you want and start typing away.

4) Even though it looks like I post every day, sometimes I will write extra posts when my kids have gone to bed on time (rarely), or when I'm feeling creative.  With typepad, I can actually set my posts to publish at a certain date and time.  So I could write now and post next week.  So cool!

5) There is a huge cult community of mommies out there to connect with and read about.  Check this out, it's crazy!!!  http://www.topmommyblogs.com or http://www.mombloggersclub.com/ Many moms just start out just writing as a diary like I did, wanting to keep an online scrapbook of their adventures.

6)  It's a MYTH that YOU as a mommy have nothing to write about. I've had a few people say, "Oh, I could never do that..."  I will guarantee that you can write.  Most nights, I have nothing on my mind and I will just start writing.  More words just start flowing as you write.  Some posts are better than others, that part is true.

7)  I have a few favourite mommy blogs.  A few are really well known like my ULTIMATE fave  Playgroups are No Place for Children who blogs about life with kids & also offers tips on mommy blogging.
Others are authors of books & blog as well: Because I said so. Others, are professional working moms who are striving to find balance: Spilled Milk.  (She's a lawyer and mommy by day, mommy blogger by night, love it!)
Janine is a sweet home-schooling pastor's wife whose memoirs are called Spoonful of Sugar.
Other mommy bloggers get to review products and give them away for free like at Millenial Housewife !

8)  When someone who feels like your friend thanks to the world of mommy blogging, but yet also feels like a celebrity thanks to the world of mommy blogging actually comments on a post YOU'VE written, it is such an exciting moment.  When Jennifer from Playgroups commented on this post, I was on CLOUD 9 for like a good hour and yelled, "Brian, Jennifer commented on my post!!"  He replied, "Ummmm WHO is Jennifer?"  : )    Um, seriously this excitment is equivalent to people who are tweeted by Donnie Wahlberg!

9a) There are many tricks to the trade that I have yet to learn. I like the design of my blog and I've added a few extras for fun but I like the fact that I just have to click "New Post" and can start typing. Keepin' it simple works for me. 

9b) There are "dummies" books out there for people like me. Blogging for Dummies and even TypePad for Dummies. I won a free copy for coming up with an idea for a book I'd write if I were to write a dummies book (FYI my book was called how to be a superstar momma & still look hot for dummies! I guess they thought it was funny!!)

10) Mommy blogging is scandalous! Lots of negative press about being a mommy blogger. Trust me...or even better, google it!

11) Mommy bloggers make change.  Check out just one example of this in an article featured in the Financial Post.

10) For only 10 bucks a year you can buy your own domain name. Hence my domain www.outnumberedmomma.com

11) Sometimes the hardest line to write is the last one. 

The moral of the story is blogging world is very complex, confusing, exciting, wacky and wonderful  and I'm just trying to navigate through it with a little style and grace.
And how's this for the last line...I've got spaghetti noodles cookin', garlic bread toastin', spaghetti sauce simmerin' & this mommy blogger has gotta run!

Much love,

: )  Keri

Mommy Bloggers

This may be your first blog reading experience, or your millionth. 

Either way...there are some things I've learned about mommy blogging that I will share with you. 
For me, as I peruse through other mommy's blogs I do gain new perspectives on parenting and life in general.

I will be honest however; I usually end up pondering another child, what I'm going to cook for dinner, my plans for the book I'm going to write in the near future, and I usually feel the need to do something domesticated. 

Not very empowering for mothers right?

Well, a lot of the moms whose blogs I read are stay-at-home or work-at-home moms.  So in the end,this full-time working out of the house momma starts to long for mundane tasks like laundry and floor mopping (oooh I just love when I get to scrub those tiles).  I love to hear about the challenges and joys other moms experience, and it makes me feel normal.  I'm the first to admit that no one is perfect and for those that pull off this mothering business acting like they are perfect, are probably lying.

When I read mommy blogs, I usually end up reading one woman's blog about her 6 children and the 2 books she's written & I wonder what life would be like with SIX children.  (I'm still on the fence about having one more!)
Then I read another sweet mom's blog who homeschools her three girls and I start to think maybe it's a good idea.
Another day I read a cool young mommy's blog who admits to reading some erotica novels in her spare time (and she's Canadian, yeah!) 
Later, I might stop by Play Groups are No Place for Children to see what this sweet momma is up to, and check out her blogging tips section (for the 21st time, 'cause I can't seem to keep them straight)

In the end...it's worthwhile time for me. It's obvious mommies have a lot on their plates.  Been there, done that, got the t-shirt quite some time ago...so when I hear people say "Oh well your blog looks like a lot of work..." I find it a wee bit irritating.

Then I find myself justifying why I write.  Then I think who am I justifying this TO? But I need to get it out, so please bear with me.  I am home pretty much ALL the time when I'm not at work.  Since working full-time I have not had any nights out, dinners out without children, no parties, just doing the mommy thing. That is NOT a complaint, it's my own choice.  To be honest, I like it that way -- I would rather be at home with my kids & husband that be away from them and feeling like I'm missing precious time with them.

That's why my blog started. I always wanted some type of journal type collection of my mommy thoughts & reminders of funny things the kids have done or said.  This is the perfect avenue, and I'm lucky enough that some people actually want to read what I have to say, and even luckier that people offer their thoughts, ideas and kind words of support.  AND I've had visitors from Norway & Austria, how cool is that?

Oh, and the best thing about blogging....in keeping with my motto...

Nothing beats free therapy.

Whewwweeeeeeeee, I feel better already!

Part of my Heart

I love my job. I love my boss. I love what I do and the opportunities I have at work.
 
Regardless of the fulfillment my job brings me on so many levels, most days I'm subconsciously thinking of what life would be like as a stay-at-home-mom.

I get up some mornings and think of how I was awake giving Sam his ba-ba of milk just an hour ago & how I'd love to stay in bed and snuggle...

I get up other mornings feeling like I'm the Queen of the professional workin' momma world. 

I had one of those mornings this morning.  I was ready to go, lookin' half decent, wearing half nice clothes, looking like a half normal woman! I was ready to conquer the world!

Then I heard it.

"Mom!"

Pitter patter of feet.

"Mom. Mom! Mommy!"

It was Owen who had sleepily wandered out of his bedroom and was calling for me. I quickly scooped him, kissed his little blonde head and hugged him tight.

My moment lasted about 60 seconds...Brian wandered into the hallway too and said he would take him back to bed and lay with him...it was a little early for him to be awake.

Straight through the heart.

I sauntered downstairs for my usual morning routine and waited for my coffee to brew...and once again I wondered if I was making the right decision.

Once I got moving again, I thought of the fulfilling and enjoyable work I do. I did everything I usually do every weekday morning. Coffee, check. Lunch, check, Lipgloss & mascara, check.  I got in the car and drove my usual drive on the usual route. Yep, I made it.
I made it to work this morning....

 

.....But not without part of my heart left at home.

Free therapy

Oooohh I was so excited to get to the computer tonight & start writing.
Busy busy day, I had the day off work to study for my lactation consultant exam.
Yes, yes I am a sucker for punishment and I also really enjoy the world of breastfeeding!

My dear friend Sarah came over this past weekend for a visit - I love chatting with her because she has a lot of mommy wisdom to share.  We met over facebook. I know - sounds creepy but we knew ALL the same peeps from highschool but never were friends.  She added me as a friend, I creeped her for about a month & then thought she was worthy of being my internet friend.  (haha)
Sometimes I think she'd be the ultimate mommy blogger 'cause she always seems to look so damn good, and she's always so put together. And calm. Really calm. And she always looks so damn good, how is it possible? She could probably write a book on it, it's impressive.

Anyway, we chat lots, mostly about raising boys (she has 2 so far) and just generally how to get through the day.    Just a few topics of conversation this weekend - Time Outs and Midnight Divorces.

As soon as I opened the door, her oldest was a bit clingy to momma and didn't want his her to go and get the baby out of the car.  She said "Ben, do you want to go in the dining room?"  I didn't think much of it since my dining room is adjacent to our front door.

Fast forward a coffee and gingersnaps later (yes I baked for Queen Sarah's arrival - she totally deserves it!) and we were talking time outs for the 2 and 3 year olds.  Sarah wondered why I had a stroller in my living room (the formal living room that is supposed to be kidless but has a table top hockey game and 3 baskets of toys in it).   

I told her the stroller is for time-outs.

When Owen deliberately pokes his brother in the eye, or pulls his hair he must go on time out & the umbrella stroller is the perfect spot.   Sarah proceeds to tell me her time out is the dining room! How perfect! Bennn...do you want to go to the dining room?  It all makes sense to me now.  It seems a little more gentle than the stroller idea. Perhaps I will try it?  Unfortunately I think Owen might need to be strapped into a seat...but perhaps it's worth a shot.

Next mommy conversation (besides me asking how she makes her hair look so good) was about the arguments between husband and wife in the middle of the night, during extreme sleep deprivation. 

Um, yeah...I hate, I'm talkin' DESPISE my husband in the middle of the night. 
Our children don't sleep, and we're totally exhausted. Thennnnnnnn we say nasty things to each other.
I lay in bed and think, tomorrow I'm going to tell him what a JERK he really is!! 
Oh WAIT, 7am rolls around, we're all good.

Sarah was so relieved to hear they weren't the only couple getting "midnight divorces".  Ha! Who knew!  I was a little relieved to hear we're not the only dysfunctional ones too.

So this post is dedicated to Queen Sarah...'cause besides writing this blog, she's the best free therapy a girl could ask for....

Labels: Sarah, therapy, midnight divorces