What rhymes with maybe and sometimes smells like $hit?

You probably already know that I have 3 beautifully healthy & handsome boys.

As I mentioned in a previous post I really think about the possibility of one more. 
People think I'm crazy (crazier than I already am anyway) when I tell them I'm just NOT sure if I am done. Like it's their business, but they sure do let me know!!

One woman told me that women are never done, that we're hard-wired to want more babies. 
Um, nope I'm pretty sure after 4 I would be over the baby phase.  I have friends that had 3 or 4 and KNEW they were done. Another friend said, "You know when you're done when your husband says you're done"

What do you think? Are we always a bit "baby hungry" as women, or does it go away once WE feel we're done having babies?

I'm actually over the baby hungry phase since the thought of another 2 years of sleep deprivation is slightly nauseating to me; but the thought of an addition to our family brings me great joy! 

Brian is almost convinced.  But then I think - really, I don't want him to be CONVINCED, I want him to express what he really feels. I don't want him to want another child just because I do.
I have this wifely intuition though, that he might be seriously considering it more lately...

Keeping in line with my Type A craziness, I'm going to share the PROS and the CONS here.

YES baby:

- bigger family = bigger fun
- like my friend Sarah said, think of Christmas with a big family and and their friends!
- my body is already like a road map of stretch marks and soggy fried egg looking breasts, one more ain't gonna make me or break me. I'm already broken!
- This time around the kids would actually be spaced apart somewhat normally.  (There are 5.5 years between Jax and Owee, and 17 months between Owee and Sammy)  3 years would be IDEAL!
- 4 is an even number
- we're already screwed for hotel rooms, we'll need 2 rooms even with 3 kids.
- we have enough space in our house
- Big family = togetherness = they will always have each other

NO baby:

- big money for education, hockey, etc...
- will we have a healthy baby? Should we leave well enough alone?
- my children are obese at birth, like off the charts ginormous.
- I might have a 12 lb baby (see above)
- My pelvic floor might not withstand another one (see above)
- Things are just getting easier here at home
- Almost out of diapers now
- I feel old!

BUT WAIT ... just think .... I might actually end up with a girl!
My friend gave me her "How to choose the sex of your baby" book. (She had 3 boys, then a GIIIIIRL!) 
Oh, I could name her something girlie like Marleigh or Jolie or some other"ie" ending name.

Then I'd have to change my blog name to "Only Slightly Outnumbered".  It'd be worth it, don'tcha think?

Comments

[Momma K]

I love hearing all the stories of little babies who squeaked their way into this world...ok...bad analogy, but so many of my friends have said things like Kelly mentioned - just about to get an IUD, or a hubby just about to get a vasectomy. I love these stories, especially because in the end the parents and the families couldn't imagine their lives without this little person! I still have this feeling that something...someone is missing!
I will take you up on the free girlie clothes if I ever get my wish ;)

Okay, I wasn't going to do this and I'm trying not to gush but Jennifer from Playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com just posted on my blog!!!!!! Go check her out (you'll LOVE her) but don't ditch me for her :)

K.

[jennifer, playgroups are no place for children]

I'm so glad you left this link in my comments, I really identify! I think for me, going from 2 to 3 would be HUGE (need a new car, would have to reconsider some future travel plans, less money, and the hotel room issue). But it's hard to just say that we're 100% done for sure, no ifs ands or buts. An addition to the family would always be welcomed!

[Sarah L.]

We thought we were done at 3 as well but apparently we weren't...life has been so much sweeter since we told the kids that there was another baby in mommys tummy. I found the coolest website that we looked at faithfully every Sunday that gave a description of what part of the baby has developed that week, and a picture to show the changes. Right up until the day I delivered, the kids were SO involved. I do regret not letting the 2 older ones into the delivery room to experience the wonder of childbirth, unfortunately, there were too many outsiders opinions that I should have ignored (that is a whole different story though)
Everyday, as I watch the bonds develop between the kids, his little blonde head surfing along the couches and his big drooly, toothy grins, it makes me wonder how I could have ever thought "I'm done"

[Kelly Coombs Woodwark]

HI Ker
Im done,done,done. No questions. No subconcious thoughts. When Isla came I was happy cause I knew what my family looked like. This was it.
However after having Lilly we thought we were done....but I had that odd feeling that someone was missing. We decided not to have anymore... but were putting off the permanent "fix" (uggg sounds like Im a dog)until more time had passed from the initial no sleep/pukey exhausted newborn period, just to be sure. It sounds really weird I know to say that "you feel someone is missing. I even said that to my mom....when she said "so your done" I thought the feeling may go away. I thought I was crazy for even thinking about the possibility of another. Jon was 98 percent sure he was done.
Then when I picked up the IUD at the pharmacy I got a pregnancy test (they were on sale after all)...but really didn't think their was any possible way I could be pregnant. Well we all know how that story ends. Baby girls 11 months apart. Sometimes world shattering surprizes turn out to be so darn good....after you catch your breath. No one is missing anymore.
Hey, if you do decide you want another and it is a girl I've got lots of clothes and cute girlie dresses up for the taking!

[She-rocka]

If anyone can do it you can. I do think we are never really done. We may think it and feel it for a long time but then we hold some little one and a those instincts come rushing to the surface. Maybe that why Grandmothers just can't get enough of grandchildren.

[Tanya M]

We had this discussion in my household. However, odds are with us... We would have ANOTHER girl. Truthfully though, bigger families are great! They go hand and hand with crazy ;)